PBR18: What If… it’s not really Personal? (Not about you)

There is this soft silence in me when I think about this topic, maybe as if the question itself is enough. Sometimes words can complicate what is, just so… simple and direct.

The question, “What if… it’s not really Personal?”

Why is this so powerful, for me? Well, because, I recognize that every emotional disturbance I might have is, ultimately, taking something to be personal that isn’t really personal. I’m imagining it to be about me.

This can send shockwaves through my human system and create the temporary intensity of both emotional pain AND emotional pleasure. However… the emotional pleasure has become the drug. The addiction to which, fuels a determination that simply looks to make and take everything personally.

The human doesn’t want to surrender the emotional high that comes with taking things personally. So, the human becomes an addict that suffers the low of taking things personally.

In this, understandable and conditioned addiction, we can’t imagine a beautiful life without the high of taking things personally. We want so insufferably bad for someone else to like us, for someone else to love us, for someone else to validate us, all serving as intangible and relative proof of our existence. This is “wanting it to be personal.”

“When you like me, I want it to be about me. Therefore, when you don’t like me, that too I must see as being about me. When you compliment my hairstyle, I want so bad for it to mean I’m worthy; therefore… if you don’t like it, it must mean I’m unworthy.

I must, in some perverse and backward way… make everything about me.”

This isn’t your fault, by the way. This happens in all human beings, to some degree. It’s not good or bad, right or wrong. However, it is a misunderstanding about what’s actually happening in reality, and this confusion creates an enormous amount of unnecessary suffering and conflict.

Let’s explore this, in the next live broadcast for… “Holding Space for Love to be Seen.”